No more sorrys

Its not that I need MORE than just “I’m sorry I don’t want to fight.” While you hug me and touch me and I cringe (because thats ALL for you. I hate it. How can you be SO stupid that you don’t even realize the person you are hugging and caressing is not hugging you back? How is it you don’t notice I’m standing silently stiff as a board!?) No, I need some thing DIFFERENT. Something I think you can’t give or won’t give and maybe I don’t even care anymore. Maybe even if you ACTUALLY suddenly started acting like you cared, started trying finally, I don’t think it would matter at this point. I don’t think I care anymore. Even if you were suddenly perfect. I don’t care. I remember everything you’ve done and then immediately tried to convince ME didnt happen! What I actually need from you? Is for you to just go away. Leave my life and never come back.